I am utterly worn out. I am completely bombarded and overwhelmed with the Grace, Love, Joy, Peace and Beauty that God is pouring out into my life and the lives of those around me daily. Whoa - not even daily but literally MOMENT by MOMENT. God is not kidding when he says to live step by step. I am simply thankful that God knows us better than we know ourselves and knew that if we took life more than a step by step we would not be able to handle it. I can barely breathe always without looking to Him, the one I can depend on and rely on in all things - Amazing and Hard. He is ever near.
You are probably wondering what on earth this week/ weekend has been full of as I start out with such a dramatic entrance to this post - the truth is it has been full of lots of Words from God, lots of promises, lots of conversations about God's direction for my life and the passions He has planted in me. Its been so great because God has grown an excitement in me for the future - which comes one step at a time, one moment at a time. It has been so sweet because God has knocked down so many walls I had up through this process of me having to be utterly honest with friends and family and loved ones about what God has set me ablaze for. He has broken my heart for the nations, for the lost, for the women who have had their identity tattered and torn. He has broken my heart for those who have yet to see faith expressed through love on their behalf. He has broken my heart for the one who dont know their maker yet, who have yet to hear that they are the Beloved. This call, to go, is stirring inside of me and I know that God is calling and I am now waiting on his perfect timing. It is a call and a dream inside my heart that is so close to becoming a reality and used to seem so far off - it is scary and exciting at the same time.
So here I am - in the Washington D.C. area - finishing my internship up with IJM and I am asking God some questions I never would have thought i'd be asking just a short year ago. I ask and hope that you will ask him these questions too, and I hope you will pray with me as I seek the next steps God has for me.
What are the gifts God has created me with?
What makes my heart race when I ponder it in my heart?
What makes my spirit stirr and get excited as I pray and as I look at the depths of the heart God gave me?
How can I glorify God above all things daily as I live?
How can I share the Gospel with others on a day to day basis?
Where am I willing to go in the name of jesus - and if the answer isn't anywhere He calls, Lord fix me and renew my perspective, because you are worthy of it all.
These are simply some of the questions that are welling up inside of me. My time at IJM has revealed a lot to me about the passions that are in my heart which God created. I haven't been able to go through this internship without thinking about our field offices and how the children, men and women in India and the Philippines are among those who are hurting and who are not free yet and how they are longing to hear that they are the Beloved. God is calling me. I am here to do my part - as I went through this week and heard the prayer requests in corporate prayer and met with the intern and fellow advisor it was just made all the more evident that God was saying "Let's go daughter, I have equipped you, I have set your heart ablaze and I long to use you to set free those who dont know freedom yet." I am applying for field fellowships and international positions not only with IJM but other organizations and I am feeling more than ever like a little child who is scared of the call but who is also excited to see all of the dreams that my Awesome God has woven in my heart come to be reality.
When we as sons and daughters begin to walk out the dreams God has knit in us I truly believe we will begin to make heaven a reality here on earth. When we walk in the ridiculous or simple things that God has created us each uniquely with and asked us to fully pursue for the glory of Himself - we will turn this world upside down. When we forget fear and we remember the Cross above all things and when we remember where we would be without the Cross and Jesus Christ - his life, death and resurrection - and we begin to live out the resurrection daily by calling that which is dead in this world to life - we will begin to tap into the Glory that God longs to inhabit the earth. We will begin to really become temples of the Living God. Let him arise in you, let him overflow from your heart to your feet and may your feet begin to move in the direction of the dreams that God has given you so that He may be seen, heard, felt, and nearer than ever for those you come in contact with. We as children of God have been set free by grace and we have been set free in order to live in complete unity with our Father - don't waste this freedom. Do not let this freedom go without being shared. Someone today needs to hear they are loved, they need to know that God has set them free. It starts and ends with prayer. Let your prayers then begin to take life as the Holy Spirit empowers you to move. Beautiful are the feet that carry good news. Go. Near. Far. Go. In Jesus' name.
Scripture to Stand on
Romans 10:9-15
"If you declare with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,”and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you profess your faith and are saved. As Scripture says, “Anyone who believes in him will never be put to shame.” For there is no difference between Jew and Gentile—the same Lord is Lord of all and richly blesses all who call on him, for, “Everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved." How, then, can they call on the one they have not believed in? And how can they believe in the one of whom they have not heard? And how can they hear without someone preaching to them? And how can anyone preach unless they are sent? As it is written: “How beautiful are the feet of those who bring good news!”
Galatians 5:6
"The only thing that counts is faith expressing itself through love."
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